Thoughts on sweaters/outfits like this?

Throughout my childhood, up until now, I never really developed a sense of fashion. I have a hard time gauging how other people will feel about certain outfits, especially if they're my outfits. I'm trying to go for a more androgynous/queer style, but nothing crazy since I'm frankly not skilled enough for high fashion. One thing I'm trying to understand is sweaters. Do people perceive the sweater in this image as more masculine, or more feminine? Is it considered masculine when wearing sweaters with jeans, but not other things? I would love to know your first thoughts/impressions when you see an outfit like this, and why
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17 Replies
carrion
carrion•5mo ago
hey whatsup, im queer & my personal style has swung from v androgynous to hyper masc and now has landed somewhere in-between. the answer to your question is going to vary wildly based on region & community - for me, it is a very masc fit, a solid, cozy fit, but not necessarily androgynous or queer in any way. But I live in a major US city with a massive queer community. Your silhouette & heavy straight lines read as masculine to my eye, but for someone else the addition of a necklace and the color choice of your sweater would make it firmly femme. Do u have any examples of androgynous or queer styles that you like? They don't have to be things you would wear rn, just fits that have caught your attention?
Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
Sorry, I should've clarified this isn't me 😅 . I saw the image online, and this person happens to have a near identical outfit to me, so I just used it instead of taking a selfie lol I have a significantly slimmer build, although my legs and butt are fairly curvy I have to leave right now, but I can elaborate more when I'm back home
DH
DH•5mo ago
To echo carrion, example pictures of fits that appeal to you in a queer/andro sense would be helpful + feel free to send some examples of your fits as well that you have specific questions about
Angrymiddleagedjew
Angrymiddleagedjew•5mo ago
To me, no matter what your build is I'd say that is a style that presents as masculine. Maybe because it's "workwear". That style of sweater was originally worn by fishermen to stay warm, jeans started as workwear, boots could go either way but they still look masculine to me. Are you trying to make that style look more feminine? Because it's harder to do with workwear but if you change the silhouette, maybe make the sweater oversized, have slim jeans and a more narrow and pointy boot it might make a difference
Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
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Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
This is what the outfit looks like on me. I’d show my legs too, but my mirror isn’t positioned well The glare hides it, but I have a light pink shirt under the sweater, that shows around the collar I'm somewhat fluid with how I want to look, so I don't mind wearing the sweater in a more masculine way. However, I'm wondering if the sweater could be used in a more feminine way One thing I'm considering is wearing bright color chino pants with the sweater, but I've never worn chinos before, so I'm not sure how to go about it.
carrion
carrion•5mo ago
no secret to wearing pants, its easy to overthink but really ya just put em on & go. I think it would be helpful for you to define what "masculine" and "feminine" mean, for yourself, and decide if you even want to adhere to those labels. You mention that you haven't yet developed a sense of style - I'd suggest compiling a personal inspo album of fits/pieces that you love (whether you can see yourself wearing them or not).
DH
DH•5mo ago
Yeah, I want to second carrion again haha. Definitely getting a more concrete personal definition of what you mean by 'masculine' and 'feminine' will be useful before any of us give you concrete advice. There's so many ways you can achieve that kind of fluidity, not just through individual pieces but also through fit, drape, color, etc. So when you ask if there's a way that your sweater can be "used in a more feminine way", that's a difficult question to answer because a) that relies on a bunch of subjective judgements and b) can be very varied. Do you want to wear it as is? What kind of style are you going for? What pieces do you already have? etc. I hope this doesn't just come off as word salad, but gives you a sense of what you should be thinking about going forward. It's all stuff I've been thinking through for the past like, 5 years haha. But ultimately your comfort, happiness and judgement is #1.
Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
The subjective answers are basically what I'm looking for 😅 I don't generally label myself, or adhere to labels, but the people around me do. I'm trying to understand how people are gendering these things, because I don't have an intuitive sense for it. I hope that makes sense I agree that I need more inspiration btw. Where would be a good place to look?
carrion
carrion•5mo ago
I hope I don't seem evasive, but any answer you get from anyone here will only be useful if your goal is to dress for that specific person. Like, I own an oversized knit fisherman sweater. I like to pair it with wide trousers, slim side-zip boots, and a ton of silver jewelry sometimes. Other times I throw it over some cotton knit pants with sneakers and a baseball cap. Both of those fits would look masc, femme, queer, het, basic, or "out there" depending entirely on the person observing me. The #inspiration channel here is solid, #waywt can give you some good examples of people wearing clothes they like (for themselves). Outside of that, themed inspo threads on /malefashion and /malefashionadvice before 2022 are a good resource. Tumblr can also be a good place to check for fashion photography & scans. I'd grab a couple of pics of things you like and bring them back here so we can provide a little bit more direction. Internet is a big place, and fashion is even bigger - you kinda just gotta dive in.
Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
Likewise, I hope I don't come across as too insistent lol. I'm enjoying the discussion, and it's giving me stuff to think about. I didn't get much inspo out of #inspiration, but I briefly checked out #waywt and saw some pretty good outfits in there. I'm going to dive in for a bit, and see if I find anything interesting to share
Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
I know this is just a sweater and some kind of pants, but I'm really sold on this outfit. This has the kind of vibe I was going for with my own sweater. I suppose I want an outfit that looks cozy, soft, relatively simple. I think I like the idea of high contrast between the sweater and pants (right now my sweater and jeans are basically the same color)
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carrion
carrion•5mo ago
"Cozy, soft, relatively simple" are infinitely more useful leads for me than gendered terms(: This picture is great, too! I'd make a thread in #questions-and-advice asking for brands & designers that make pieces to fit this style. In the meantime, I'll drop a few pics from my inspo album from last year that feel relevant, maybe you'll find something u like!
carrion
carrion•5mo ago
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Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
I like that 2nd image, but otherwise I have a hard time with this kind of inspo. It feels too high fashion, and honestly it's hard to imagine myself in that outfit when they're using supermodels with chiseled faces like handsome squidward lol. Hard to imagine my face over theirs', if that makes sense Outside of this server, are there any good places to find more down-to-earth inspiration?
carrion
carrion•5mo ago
hah thats a fair perspective, but inspo doesn't have to mean "im going to wear exactly that", it can mean "i like how voluminous those pants are" or "i never considered a pattern/texture like that"(: I'd make a brand reccs thread and peak thru the lookbooks on whichever brand sites people recommend. generally those lookbooks are created to showcase each season in a very easy-to-wear manner. /malefashionadvice inspo albums from the last few years would be a good place to look, but maybe someone else can recc "down-to-earth" inspo! best of luck!
Joe Balogna
Joe Balogna•5mo ago
I'll think about making some threads tomorrow. Thanks for the help