The Beginner Mindset - Topic of the day 7/3/25
It can be hard to start thinking about clothes differently - that's partly why we're all here. If you consider yourself still new at this, what pitfalls have you encountered or successes have you experienced? If you don't consider yourself a beginner, when did that change? How do you handle any ruts, issues or changes that arise now?
27 Replies
oh god
I think in the beginning i was totally lost and quite unable to articulate what I liked.
I think the most consequential pitfall I see people fall into is deciding they want to dress better and immediately spending ~any money on that goal before they have any sense of direction
Basically "do I like this?" was a question that felt daunting to answer.
And I feel like that was the biggest change for me personally.
I have dressed well and I have dressed badly but I have always been deeply convinced that I had that shit on
And that’s what matters
I'm not so deep in the clothes game but in alot of creative endeavors, I feel there is a big hurdle of finding the right balanced approach.
As a beginner, you dont know what this means which is like the crucial pitfall. Many people do not feel they are actually a beginner, as they have had some experience w/ clothes their entire lives, and run the risk of limiting future growth on possible faulty or bad assumptions. Other people might assume as a beginner they know absolutely nothing, which is rarely true... we know sort of what we like or do not, even if we can not articulate it.
there is the danger of someone going all out and buying any and everything right away, there is also a danger of being scared to make moves because it could be "wrong" .
So i think there needs to be a balance of risk and reflection, being open to feedback but also following your own direction.
I think the core of getting into it is yes, figure out what you like. But also you got to put yourself out there and accept risk of dressing bad. This is a huge step. Changing your style is always going to draw attention, so changing it and then dressing bad is actually extremely noticeable. Unfortunately, you build on a foundation of bricks.
So to me the thing is don't be afraid of iteration and looking bad. I still sometime brick outfits (a lot less now though), but I iterate and get feedback (from this server, or elsewhere). Any creative thing involves putting yourself out there and that comes with downsides.
Basically, everyone wants to look cool without doing the work
i dressed like shit -> i bricked a thousand fits -> i gathered a bunch of inspo -> i asked people questions and only sometimes took it badly when they roasted me -> i started buying clothes that were better fitting and/or cooler -> i looked at ten million outfits and articles of clothing across the spectrums of gender and style to inform what i like -> i have a better sense of what i like and more confidence exploring that even if it’s a newer direction
like smiles said every time you do something new you’re probably going to be kinda bad at it
if i pivot to or start incorporating something new into my style it’s gonna take iteration
You can backsearch some of my first outfits on this server
they are honestly terrible lol
like some grains of ideas i later used but mostly really bad
progress isn’t linear etc etc
now im consistently considered "fashionable" in my day to day life by people
it takes time, effort, feedback, learning about yourself and what you like, and a willingness to fail
to some degree also accepting that you will stand out if you put in effort
and that among your friends who don’t care about clothes you’re gonna be the weird one
though maybe that applies more the weirder your clothes are
nah like im not super super weird but it stands out
like people notice you
also just takes time to learn all the stuff, i love to have ideas of different "menswear" outfits i reference even if the outfits im thinking of may have never really existed in that form
and i didn't start there, its from just putting time in i have so many thoughts of different outfits to reference and draw from
and the other thing is sometimes you're gonna spend way too long in front of the mirror getting increasingly frustrated
ive made myself late to work cause i can't get the outfit i want to work. Or just spent like 30+ minutes on a weekend trying shit and getting mad
this shit isn’t effortless
like yes at some point you will land on outfits that are repeatable and a sense of what clothes you own work together
ya sometimes i get frustrated and just go to an outfit i know will work
yep
one hundo p
nothing worse than deciding right before you leave to try something new
and it going not great
and then spending 20 minutes iterating
being late
and going w the thing you originally planned
imo another part is letting go and i know a lot of friends who struggle w that
personally i hate having something in my closet that i barely wear because i can’t figure out how to make it work
reducing the friction between “i need to get dressed” and “i know what to wear” helps me at least feel like i’m less of a beginner than i was
in the last 3? years i’ve done at least 2 full wardrobe on the bed, try on every garment, sort into keep/give it a year/get rid of cycles and it’s been amazing
still have too many sweaters for a mf who gets to wear them 2 months a year but
I’d consider myself a beginner still. Reiterating what others have said, take it slow and don’t be afraid to look a little silly while you’re figuring things out.
Another thing that I don’t think has been mentioned is to take pictures, even if you don’t plan on sharing them. I’ve found that i often have different feelings and new ideas about an outfit the tenth time I’ve seen it (in my photos) than the first or second.
Also, try to shamelessly copy outfits that you really like. I think the times that I’ve been successful at that have been when I’ve learned the most.
Clothing is an infinite rabbithole and we’re all either beginners or delusional (and still beginners)
I feel so fucking validated like forreal I will have an idea for a fit, put it on, think "what if i switched the undershirt to a different color?", try 5 colors, get frustrated, wonder why I look off, then bitterly put the OG outfit on
Leave the house thinking "i am the most ridiculous person alive who the fuck can't get DRESSED"
A year ago I was on here asking people to help explain stuff like how you know an outfit is good. Everybody told me you just put that shit on and figure it out. I was pretty unsatisfied with that at the time lol, but now if someone asked me that I’d tell them the exact same answer.
I'm him, I've been him, and I will continue to be him.
Still a beginner, still experimenting, still having fun. Sometimes I nail it, sometimes I don't. I think the ratio between the two is improving, slowly.
I wish I could try on stuff before buying them, but that's not possible especially 2nd hand stuff. As a fashion noob I learned the hard way that even measurements don't always tell the whole story about how well something will fit. Also some garments look great online but look less good when I actually put them on.
In the beginning god made j crew
Hello again, it's been, uh, a while! Still 100% considering myself a beginner, and glad to come back and resume soaking up the inspiration I've been missing this last year or two.
The challenge I face that's kept me in beginnerhood: finding the time and energy to practice putting together "real" outfits. I work 5 to 6 days a week with horses, so my work wardrobe is riding breeches and sun shirts. Work days are often 10 to 12 hours, and I spend an hour commuting, so by the time I'm home and showered and fed I'm pretty much sludge.
I generally only go out once a week in normal clothes (running errands in an attempt at style!), maybe twice a week if I'm lucky. Despite that, my wardrobe is larger than my office-worker husband's. But I only love, like, four pieces in it.
I'm finally acknowledging that I'm (like everyone else!) fucking exhausted all the time, and just need to put in whatever effort I can. Minute steps forward are still progress, and will make me a lot happier than staying stagnant.