beginner, gravitating towards softboy(?) aesthetic and have some questions
i (26M) saw some advice that when you're starting out, you should start figuring out your style by browsing around on social media and then looking for recurring themes in the stuff you like. i'm asian and have been thoroughly primed by social media and some friends to prefer this softboy (or whatever it's called) aesthetic, and now my pinterest is flooded with this.
i do think i like it and it looks comfortable, but i have some questions:
1. it all looks a bit samey, so i feel like i'm pigeonholding myself. does anyone have recommendations for people to follow/keywords to search for something like, softboy-adjacent so i can get some ideas for light/medium variations?
2. what age range is this style for?
3. a lot of those pins (90%+) are advertisements for shein products, which i dont want. which brands cater towards this sort of look? i know uniqlo does. muji also seems to but i don't live near one.
109 Replies
Hi @stoveconsumer! For better answers, include:
- Reference pictures
- Budget in numbers
- Specific measurements
- Openness to buying secondhand and/or online
- Location: country/continent is fine
- Timing/urgency
I'm not a good keyword knower so I'll punt #1 to someone who might be able to help better, although definitely note that you do not need to align yourself with a specifically labeled style or anything to do fashion right. You can take those pics you've found of what you like and look for others outside of that style and compile them together into your own thing.
IMO worrying about age vs style is not a productive though process, if you like what you are wearing and feel comfortable and confident in it, people will not judge you any more than normal. people in their 20s wear ties and vintage blazers and paisley all the time and look sick doing it.
Uniqlo and Muji definitely prominent for this kind of style, you don't strictly have to shop in person, can shop Muji online as well.
maybe as a more relevant way to look for inspo, a lot of what you have saved here is straight or wider leg pants, sweaters or long sleeve tees, mid-saturation earth tones, could look for fits across other aesthetics that integrate these things and see if you can broaden your interests that way
of course recommending #inspiration and #waywt and #waywt-highlights
Don't put yourself in a box, that is honestly the most overarching advice you'll get.
And most and more importantly, don't let others (including friends) put you in a box
ty, this is helpful, i didnt have the vocab to even describe it so this is good direction. im so new to this that i was suspicious about shopping online b/c i can't tell what will fit and won't, and i dont want to pay the shipping costs back if i dont have to lol do you have any tips for that? i have my measurements but i dont feel confident eyeballing it until i shop more ig
yeah for sure, what i meant by that part was that im primed by my friends and the ambient media sphere or whatever to like these things myself, so maybe this is the puppet who knows about the strings but likes the result (atm). so i do genuinely like the styles im being recommended here, but i was concerned specifically that the algorithm would keep me in the box by sharing 100 different variations of the same general look
if you have clothes at all similar to what you're looking at that's usually the strategy is to measure those and compare against the garment measurements of what you're considering, should be able to approximate fit from that.
for returns, a lot of online shops will have good return policies to help get around this anxiety of fit. muji and uniqlo both for example should let you ship back the return items for free with labels they give you so long as you just try it on briefly and keep the tags on before returning.
will definitely check inspiration and waywt
oh do they? i saw uniqlo was charging $7 for their returns, i assumed muji did something similar
ah I might have bad info
you are correct, uniqlo does charge $7 for returns
muji I think is free
uniqlo charges a few bucks now but yeah not too bad
oh yeah youre right muji is free, thats kinda crazy https://www.muji.us/pages/return-policy
but I get it, it's hard to beat trying on in person, so you really could just start with some uniqlo stuff if that's available to you in person and that way you can just get a feel for how you want these things to fit and get started with a method you're more comfortable with
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this is helpful ty, i think i saw this awhile back but i saw it was 2019 so i couldnt tell if it'd gone out of style or whatever, but ig if i like how it looks then it shouldnt matter
its just gone through some iteration
stuffs always in style, its just elevated basics
and yeah if you like it, can't fault it
in fact i think this style looks better when it gets expanded a bit with other styles personally
CHCM shop, Glasswing, and Neighour's brands are evolutions on it, Lemaire as well
Scandinavian stuff like Our Legacy (itself based on vintage Armani) is another similar route
Some acne studios stuff even
and even if these stores are a bit spendy for your budget, you can use them to pull influences on their styles, and also look for second hand of these brands
On the korean side there's Amomento, Anglan, and a bunch of others
Sillage too
Musinsa carries a bunch tho its hit or miss ontheir brands, and Obscura-Store Seoul carries a bunch of brands, some of which fall under that
UNIQLO CHARGES FOR RETURNS?
really appreciate the brand recs, i was searching like "softboy brand" and was getting nowhere lol
yea apparently they deduct it from your refund
WHAT
they tightened up
keep on topic noah lmao
its just return shipping
but if u buy online u cant return in store
it's ok i think it's funny
keep off topic noah lmao
low classic seoul is decent for inspo https://lowclassic.com/
Estudio Niksen
so is youth lab https://youth-lab.kr/category/men/23/
Needles
cool they are giving you brand recs. On the like pidgeon-holed thing just get into fashion and you'll figure out what you like over time trust
a lot of stuff from COS falls under it tbh, both womens and mens
like if you like wearing the clothes thats what matters
Millo Archive
Sage Nation
any time I come into a thread I'm really just stalling until the brand knowers can show up
lmao
for #2 I feel like it's inoffensive enough to work for like any Asian dude below like 40 lmao
very easy to dress up a bit if too casual bc it's already using a lot of menswear adjacent pieces
works for any dude any age smh
no he said Asian in the question so I was referring to that part :HOLY:
also i think a lot of these clothes can come up on used sites which is a great way to start, some of the cheaper brands not great used but a lot of these brands can be had decently cheap through ebay and grailed, even thrifting for this.
Despite all this, don't go on a buying spree - now you know what you wanna look like. The next step is to start putting together outfits and figuring out what is working and looking like what you want, and what isn't
semi adjacent inspo
where are you looking for recs?
ik insta is pretty bad at railroading you into one niche on explore unless you actively start following stuff outside of that very specific subgenre
personally i found places like this server huge for that aspect but everyone has their own way of doing it
realistically follow some of the brands listed here on IG and the algo will start force feeding u stuff, or use pinterest
I thought Pinterest died
all AI slop now
i dont think i could pull off 1-4 and 6 lol, but i like 5 and 7
def, theyre just possible ways to take the style
You could
I guarantee it, you can pull off anything
If you like something don't be hampered by what you think you can or can't pull off
honestly half of getting into this stuff is breaking out of ur comfort zone a little bit to find out what stuff is "I don't like this" and what stuff is "I shouldn't be wearing this" cuz thought #2 is dumb lame and wrong
i was looking at pinterest, i have an insta but it seems like way worse of an interface for me for general browsing. if pinterest is all ai then it fooled me 🫠
is this a height thing lol
JP brands fit my height more as far as outerwear is concerned
not all AI but it's getting harder to sort imo
ig easier if u make a dedicated account for ur fashion stuff and just follow some brands
everything imperfect these days but its somewhat bearable like that
also obligatory ssstein recommendation for knitwear
leans very hard into the slightly oversized look
well in terms of pulling stuff off, i cant tell sometimes whether i like the outfit or if i like how the guy looks. i think 2 and 3 are ok, and i think 1 and 4 are solid but i feel like some amount of that is just that i like the guy's face. i just know sometimes im in the fitting room and i literally wince, like there's some uncanny valley thing going on with me and some clothes
yeah I think like pretty much everyone getting into fashion deals with that and it's a process. not saying you gotta like dive headfirst into the deep end and go nuts or anything. but just remember that we build up a lot of insecurities and "rules" about how we should or shouldn't look and all they really serve to do is restrict our ability to be authentically ourselves. if you keep it in the back of your head you'll figure it all out eventually.
y'all are so nice lmao
yeah ill try to branch out a bit for sure, will just take it slower for a bit but sooner or later
I was going to say that I actually am very familiar with that feeling, but a lot of the time the solution is just to put that shit on until it becomes normal to you
Btw if you use uniqlos alteration services you cant return them I'm pretty sure, fyi
i guess that makes sense
tbh i didnt know they had that lol, is it better value than a tailor?
happy to know it's not just me 🫠
will agree that when you first get into it that feeling like the model automatically wears it better is very pervasive
had to start getting into the mindset of picturing myself in a piece first when I see it online instead of considering the model pic
this is so real, rest easy knowing that basically everyone experiences this in some way
Its just convient ig, dont rely on it if you dont want it, its just there
I wouldn't really tailor that much early on
Uniqlo is a good start for just getting beater pieces to experiment
you'll curate some more stuff as you go on that will likely outlive the extra money spent on alterations
Yeah i was just letting you know, dw about it
the one thing i was thinking about getting adjusted/tailored was maybe the lengths of some shirts? i saw some people on yt seemingly crop everything to get the 1/3 2/3 split or whatever between the top and bottom
imo ironically one of their strengths is that their fabrics are very pliable
you can just tuck em or fuck around with safety pins if you can get em for that look
You can tuck it in to see if you like it and then use fabric scissors yourself if you really want
^
Depending on shirt/material ofc
But for cotton/natural fibres is fine
is that what people are doing to get this, floppy(?) look of the t-shirt over the belt? idk what this is called when the shirt like bubbles up like that
Yeah you tuck it in fully and then lift your arms up
Gives it a bit of room that flops over the belt
yep
i feel like my t-shirts never look that clean when i tuck them in
is it smooth like that all around?
you need an intentionally longer shirt for that lol
oic
ergo wouldn't really need to cut down a long one
if it's short it might bunch up at the corners
should be
I do it with Uniqlo tees and it's fine
you can move the fabric around to the side of the hips if you want to try to cover it from the front view
what would i search if i wanted a tutorial for this? yt search kinda bad now and "cropping shirt with safety pins" isnt getting me anything
safety pin tailoring should have some hits but it's mostly waist adjustments
it's the same basic idea of grab the loose fabric you want to tuck -> poke the safety pin needle from the inside of the shirt through both spots and lock
Aesthetic :)
YouTube
How to crop your t-shirt without cutting it #aestheticclothes #crop...
How to crop your t-shirt without cutting it #aestheticclothes #cropshirt #aestheticstyles
this is kinda the same idea with rubber bands
ooh ok that makes sense
thanks!
just looked and its actually weird how unavailable a video like this is lol
you'd think someone would have uploaded it but no
yeah in general i have trouble searching anything these days so i thought i was just searching the wrong thing
9/10 google results are top 10 lists
this is a very tough year to start getting into fashion lmao
AI is everywhere and yt/Google is borderline useless
trust me it's not just you for search results it is absolutely horrid to rawdog inspo rn
You can never go wrong with corduroy pants, I got one at cotton on and its by far my favorite, best if you match it with a cream top
ty i will put this on my list, will be nice for the fall
you can also wear a sweater and layer it with a brown overcoat too, just dont get one thats too long
oh right if you're find with going more analog
Popeye magazine specializes in this and their Feb-Apr issues will have a lot of styled pics
what does analog mean in this context
like a physical magazine lol
oooh lmao i was thinking it was a style
oh neat they have a free trial, i can check it out
iirc we have a link somewhere w/ a bunch of magazine archives
lemme see if i can find it
https://discord.com/channels/1116793467654381685/1298218189188104273/1298243036874145884
here we go
wow that's awesome, thanks
also im really far behind on this thread
but if it hasnt been said, posting fits in #waywt is a big help
can help you see your stuff side by side with other people
and gives you a place to put your stuff and look back on it
whether looking back on it is a an hour later, a week, or a year
also because I'm curious what direction you go and what you choose to wear
yeah joan mentioned it as an inspo source, i wouldnt have thought about posting there myself tho. but sure ill try and give it a shot when i get some stuff 🙏
Your pins remind me a lot of the "how to breathe" albums https://discord.com/channels/1116793467654381685/1294052690204295289/1294192176527310899
I think the samey facet is also to do with the hairstyle done with the outfit. If you went with more diverse hair ideas (eccentric, western, metal) you would find your own look.
I would start with some second-hand Kaptain Sunshine and see where it goes. You’ll probably like everything that Namu carries. They have incredible styling.
on using pinterest for inspo, i use it a lot but the problem i have isn't AI slop, but ads and the algorithm just being weird in general. Like I pin one picture of a specific person and then everything i get recommended is them, or sometimes the feed will just be ads for a while. also their search is pretty bad. but i keep using it because the stuff people had added over the years is really diverse and the model makes more sense for this purpose than instagram
(I do check instagram as well though)
the best use for it imo though is to look at the page for a picture you like and see what it recommends thats similar, it can help when trying to find adjascent ideas to something
ah, i didnt think about that. any inspo recs for this sort of aesthetic with more different hair?
yeah i think the really fuzzy search makes it hard, though for sufficiently generic items it seems ok for me to get some examples about what to wear with it
i do like these a lot! they're a little pricier so i might wait a while, but in the meantime is there an easy way to see like price history for a certain item on ebay or grailed? it's hard for me to tell what's a good deal from here
to head this off a little bit, I know this might seem like a silly rule but we hard line don't allow hair fashion advice/discussion in here. explanation is that majority of the times it comes up (not by anyone in here) it's in a context of bad looksmaxxing shit and it's easier to just ban it since we struggle with that enough with just the fashion stuff.
and anyway, hairstyle I think is often the feature that you can control that is most external for fashion, can get away with most combinations of hair styles and fashion styles without it looking discordant. and all the tips for inspo finding here applies just as well to hairstyles, just gotta do that work outside of here.
oh gotcha, all good then. ill just keep an eye out for stuff that looks nice!
thx for explaining that btw because I remember when it changed but never saw why
filter sold listings on ebay
they'll tell you the date sold and how long it was listed to sell
also consider stock (i.e. is the item a seasonal release or limited to one collection)
you can negotiate more aggressively if it's a piece with few bites/has been sitting for a while